in a world where he is emasculated by social engineering…
The Manipulated Man (German: Der Dressierte Mann) is a 1971 book by author Esther Vilar. The main idea behind the book is that women are not oppressed by men but rather control men to their advantage.
Vilar writes, “Men have been trained and conditioned by women, not unlike the way Pavlov conditioned his dogs, into becoming their slaves. As compensation for their labours men are given periodic use of a woman’s vagina.” The book contends that young boys are encouraged to associate their masculinity with their ability to be sexually intimate with a woman, and that a woman can control a man by socially empowering herself to be the gate-keeper to his sense of masculinity. Vilar states that this has been going on for some time.
The author says that social definitions and norms, such as the idea that women are weak, are constructed by women with their needs in mind. Vilar explains how it works: if women are viewed as weak, less is expected of them; and therefore they are given more leeway in society than men. Vilar states that women are generally “gold diggers” who attempt to extract money and other material resources from men. One means by which women control men to effect this transfer of resources is praise. Women dole out praise to men only when their needs are met in some way.
Another means of manipulation is the calculated use of emotional displays. Vilar claims that women can control their emotional reactions whereas men cannot, and that women create overly-dramatized emotional reactions to get their way: they “blackmail” men emotionally. Women also use sex as a tool of manipulation and control but also traditional concepts of love and romance, which are seen more positively than sex, to control men’s sexual lives. Vilar writes that men gain nothing from marriage and that women coerce them into it under the pretense that it fulfills their romantic desires.
The book closes with Vilar stating that it would be difficult to change the situation by appealing to women, as women are unsympathetic to the plight of men, and unwilling to give up their comfortable position in society. It is up to men to see past the deception and emotional blackmail and subject it to open criticism before any meaningful changes can occur.